Anna and Morgan have been together for 15 years and they’ve developed an extraordinary relationship. But how did they get there? What is the foundation of their strong relationship? What did their journey look like? In this episode of My Extra Mile, Anna + Morgan share how they developed their relationship and what ‘life together’ looks like for them.

You will want to hear this episode if you are interested in…

 

  • What ‘life together’ means to Morgan + Anna
  • Building an extraordinary relationship on unconditional trust
  • Why “Self-love” isn’t woo-woo but vitally important
  • Internal motivation is the driving factor for change
  • Why you NEED to nail down your shared values
  • The difference between a belief and a value
  • Why people attract the wrong men or women
  • An exercise: Look at your non-negotiables together

A life lived 100% together

 

Anna + Morgan do ALL of life together. They work from home together, they work out together, and they travel the world together. Morgan jokes that the only reason they don’t have kids yet is because he doesn’t like going to the gym alone.

 

Has it always been easy? Of course not. Things were toxic when they were young and in the “party” phase of their life. They’re careful to point out that they’re not perfect and their life journey is unique to them.

 

You simply have to know what you want. Anna knew from the time she met Morgan that he was always going to be in her life. They failed forward together and held each other through the lowest of the lows. They’ve navigated the highs together as well.

 

They’ve had so many ups and downs. Morgan has spent many nights on the couch. But they’ve gotten to a beautiful stage in their 30’s. They don’t really fight—they disagree, then they’re over it. But how did they get there?

Unconditional trust + Self-love

 

Morgan points out that their relationship is built on unconditional trust. He trusts Anna with his life. Whatever is going on, they always come back together. They know that they can’t live without each other in their lives. They’re a team, a unit, lovers, & best friends. They take those responsibilities seriously.

 

But they also love themselves—and unconditional love for yourself spills over into your relationships. You have to feel whole in yourself first to feel whole in a relationship. As you learn to love and trust yourself more, your relationship can flourish. Anna loves the quote by Maya Angelou: “I don’t trust people who don’t love themselves and tell me, ‘I love you.'”

 

People run into issues because they look for motivation from external circumstances or other people. External factors can be motivating, but the motivation for real and lasting change—physical or otherwise—has to come from within.

 

Because Anna and Morgan strive towards becoming their own powerful individuals their life together has become sweeter and more grounded. But they admit it’s a journey.

You NEED alignment on core values

 

What are your shared values? If your highest value doesn’t align with your significant others, the simple truth is that you probably won’t work out. That’s not saying you have to agree on everything—because that’s not how relationships work. But your life-values need to align and adapt together. You can have separate growth journeys, but they need to intersect.

 

Morgan’s example is Protestants and Catholics: Their core beliefs are completely different, but their values are the same. You need to sit down and hash out what your values are together. For Anna and Morgan, the things that matter most to them—honesty, integrity, humor, and trust—bind them together.

 

So how do you develop an extraordinary relationship? How do you find out if your values align? Anna and Morgan state you need to determine your values.

 

Determine your values by taking Dr. DeMartini’s Value Determination Test. Most people think they know where their values lie and then find out they were dead wrong. It’s perfectly fine—but it’s better to know. You can then navigate and work out your life around your values. If your relationship is in turmoil and you’re at a crossroads, nail down your individual values. If they don’t intersect, it may be time to move on.

 

Anna and Morgan share other resources that they believe impacted their relationship positively—be sure to listen for their recommendations.

Connect with Anna + Morgan

Connect with David T. S. Wood

 

Check out this episode!